Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Technology...the wonder-drug

So, if you haven't heard, I broke my phone. Completely in half.


This is the best phone I've ever owned. When I bought it, I asked the salesman if they had one made of titanium, since I'm known to be hard on phones (that might be an understatement). This one wasn't titanium, but it withstood a lot of drops, several onto concrete. The last drop (actually, more of a flight) from the van to the parking lot started its demise--I didn't mind the 2 big cracks (my last phone was held together with black electrical tape, so cracks are nothing), but when I lost the front screen and the inside screen started turning strange yellowish colors, I knew the end was near.

Something prompted me to upload the photos onto Facebook Saturday morning...the inside screen started turning yellow Saturday afternoon and was completely gone by Saturday night (which meant I lost my text-messaging capabilities--NOT a good thing for me). And the phone completely popped in half later that night.

I have a new phone now. It's purple. Plum, actually. And it's a pretty cool phone--I think I'm going to like it. Not as well as the old one...and I don't think it's as durable, but I still haven't found that titanium one, so I'll settle for a cool color. And I've learned how to make my own ringtones, so I'm not too heartbroken over all of the ringtones I lost from the old phone.


But. I lost things. I'm a keeper of memories. My text message storage was over 80% full of messages that I just couldn't bring myself to delete. Some were funny...probably only to me, probably because you just had to be there in the moment. Some were sad, like the message telling me the tent at God's Katrina Kitchen was down. Some were good advice, like the one from Chad reminding me that I was bought with a price and there wasn't an "unsigning clause" on the day I was ready to give up and walk away. And some of them...well, they were sweet at one time, but painful to read now. Reminders of how life turns on a dime and leaves you looking at your empty hands and wondering what the hell just happened. Deleting them acquiesced to defeat and I wasn't ready to give that ground yet. I wasn't ready to let go.

Technology, though, had other plans. For a clean slate and a new start. Doesn't matter if I like it or not. Doesn't matter if I was ready to turn the page. Maybe it's a good thing that I now have a new plum phone with an empty inbox. Maybe I can see tomorrow (or even today) better if I'm not turning to glance back at yesterday. Maybe it's a good thing that decision didn't rest in my hands. I feel kind of robbed and naked right now, but in the end, I might just be grateful that I was dragged into a new day.

This is one of the ringtones I lost. Not sure yet if I'll use it again, even though it remains one of my favorite songs. Who would ever have guessed how appropriate it would be right now?


"Into the Day"--Bebo Norman

You could turn a hundred years and never empty all your fears
They’re pouring out like broken words and broken bones
They could fill a thousand pages, be the cry for all the ages
And the song for every soul who stands alone

The ache of life is more than you are able

Hold on love, don’t give up
Don’t close your eyes
The light is breaking through the night

Step out into the day, all the clouds and all the rain are gone
It’s over now
Step out into the sun, for you have only begun to know
What it’s all about
As the hungering dark gives way to the dawn, my love
It’s over now

Time will let the story told grow and grow ‘til it unfolds
In a way that even you cannot ignore
You can say the seasons change but never if you just remain
In a place where the freeze is at your door

What you don’t know is the signs are right for the turning tide

Hold on, hold on

It won’t be long
So hold on

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